My American Idol Audition, 2005, by Kenneth Frank Vennard
From MemoryArchive
Who: Kenneth Vennard What: American Idol Auditions When: August 2005 Where: Foxboro, MA
WARNING: WRITTEN WITH TERRIBLE GRAMMAR AND STUFF.
It was so nuts there. My boss and mentor Kelly, fellow aspiring Idol Deidre and I got to Foxboro stadium on tuesday in the early afternoon and there was no line at all to get our tickets and wristbands! Surprisingly, we were out of there really quickly Tuesday (we expected a long wait but were out of there within 20 minutes or so). After we recieved our stuff, we watched some wannabes doing an Idol Underground competition that was really lackluster. We went to the hotel and checked in shortly after that. It was so lovely (top floor is for the fancy peeps) and then we went and had the SALAD BAR AT RUBY TUESDAYS. So delicious. Then we went back to the hotel and jammed a bit and got some advice from Miss Kelly (duh, she was accepted to Julliard!) and hit the hay.
On wednesday Deidre was up at 3am, I woke up at 4:15 and we got ready for the big day. We left the hotel at 5:20ish and got back to Foxboro a little before 6, waited in line for maybe 15 minutes to get in the stadium and they seated us in the order we had been ticketed the day before, so there were probably four thousand people before us and maybe a thousand after us auditioning. There were 14 booths and each booth auditioned 4 people at a time, so there would be like 60 people at any given time "auditioning".
So at around 7:30am they shift a bunch of people around to fill some gaps and we shoot the big swooping crowd shots and do some cheesy stuff, you know, yelling out how Boston is WICKED AWESOME!! Whatever. Then we wait... and wait........ and wait (which was actually a ton of fun if you ask me). There were just soooo many people and we watched from across the football field as everyone auditioned (we couldn't hear but we could see them all). So if you got on to the next round you would get a yellow piece of paper and go to the right, deeper inside the stadium where you would fill out paperwork and find out where to go the next day for round 2. If you made it past round 2, you'd come back in October to audition for the celebrity judges. And like most people, if you didn't get through round 1, your wristband was cut off by a crew member and you'd exit the stadium to the left.
We came in contact with a bunch of strange people. Immediately to our left was 'drunk girl', she looked like a 30 year old trying to be 18. Kelly said she wreaked of alcohol and she kept saying "I HATE PEOPLE" and "I'M CLAUSTROPHOBIC". So awesome. And like, she ended up leaving at 1 in the afternoon. After waiting for almost 7 hours, she left?! Apparently she was there on a bet involving money if she made it through. Yikes. We snapped a picture of her while we were attempted to take a photo of a Corey Clark look-a-like hanging out with a Clay Aiken look-a-like (to little avail).
To our right was a woman and her daughter, and they didn't speak at all the whole time, not even to each other. It was weird. They just sat and watched everything. Behind us was a trio of mother-daughter couples, one of which drove FOURTEEN HOURS from michigan to audition. I think they just wanted to come and do it and I bet you anything they'll go to the chicago audition as well (since the girl didn't make it to round 2). There was also a dood that was rocking the Gavin Degraw beanie hat right in our row and he like, bought extra waters at the concession stand to hand out to people?? You can see him attempting to sing radiohead on boston.com/idol, click 'cutting room floor' or something and he's the guy with the hat about 2 minutes in.
Oh and then there was ANNOYING BOY. This freaking, kid. He would NOT SHUT UP and was standing up the whole time trying to get people to sing and like, I dunno. You know that bratty kid in your neighborhood and when he grows up he looks exactly the same, except with facial hair? He was that kid. He was auditioning in the section before us so it was kind of nice to see him walk away to the exit of the stadium. Sad but true.
And, like all good nightmares, there were plenty of WA alumni there. Just kidding. Scotty t. was like 2 rows in front of us (What are the chances??) and Mike and Casio Lanno, as well as Amy and Alyssa were in the section auditioning after us! So we got to exchange pleasentries with them, it was a good time!
We also saw this kid show up at the far side of the crowd (the section auditioning first) with camera crews all around him, he was COVERED in spikes (he was dressed as a member of GWAR.) The costume was made all out of duct tape. So we of course watched him walk up and audition and make it to round 2. I'm sure you'll see him on the boston episode in January when it airs and I'm suuure he'll get rejected (he rapped "Ice Ice Baby" according to the news). But he'll be on television, which is more than I can say, right? hah. There were a couple other people that got through that way (one girl was dressed in rainbow hippy clothes and despite tripping over herself she made it through. So if i learned anything in Foxboro it is that COSTUMES will get you anywhere you want to go in life.
So really not a lot of people were making it through to the second round. As we kept watching, someone would get a bright yellow piece of paper every 10 minutes or so. Which meant probably one in every hundred people maybe. At one point the wind blew so hard that the yellow tickets went flying onto the field and people HOOTED AND HOLLERED. The thought that maybe one will fly right into their face and no one will be the wiser that I didn't earn it at my audition ran through dozens of ironically detached minds! Deidre GASPED at the sights and sounds of the happenings.
We waited for 8 hours, and by 2pm it was finally our turn to audition. We got up to the small line of people standing waiting to be assigned a booth, they snapped our pictures right before our auditions and told us which booth to go to. Deidre and I seperated ourselves in the line to avoid being put at the same booth (because no booths were giving out two tickets at one time). I think she ended up at booth 12 or 13? I was sent to booth 6 and watched as the group of 4 ahead of me finished up. The producer or auditioner or judge or WHOEVER she was (she couldn't have been older than me by more than a couple of years) told 2 of them to leave, and kept 2 to each sing a song again. one sang so incredibly well and then one was really shuffling on her feet and not doing anything special at all. And to my surprise they pulled out a yellow ticket and gave it to the bad girl. They told the good one that she was great but that they wouldn't be sending her through.
By that time I kind of figured that my chances of going through were gone now that they had just given out a ticket at my booth and that only 1 ticket was being given out every 10 minutes or so. The chances of 2 people from the same booth one after the other was a big fat ZERO. So my row of 4 lined up side by side and one at a time stepped forward to sing. I was the last to audition from the group. The first was this stout looking guy dressed nicely who sang a tenacious d song and was being really ridiculous and like getting all up in the judge's face and whatever. At first I smiled but then I was like 'Uhhh I should look disinterested', so I didn't pay attention to him really. Then the two girls in the middle each went, they were homely nerdy best friends that were trying too hard to look hip (Britney floppy hats?) and giving each other high fives after their sub-par performances of Faith Hill songs or whatever. So I was like YES I'M GUNNA ROCK and so I said my name and the song I'd be singing. I sang "Tempted", and I think I did pretty well considering the wind was blowing so hard and that there were people singing at other booths on either side of me. I finished and stepped back in anticipation of the results. The girl said 'Thanks, unfortunately all 4 of you will not be sent to the next round'. Balls. Soooo I picked up my bag and the guy cut my wristband off (and said that he liked my song PSHHHHF) and I exited the stadium. Scott was out there, too (he had auditioned a minute before me). I didn't see Deidre so I was pumped thinking that she had made it though, but then she came out a few minutes later with her own story of lame judges. Actually, her story really is kind of a bummer. Kelly was watching from the seats and said that no one from our section made it (she could see all 14 booths).
But anyways, I wasn't really too bummed, because I had in mind that they were casting a TV show and that they were looking for something that I just am not right now. And that's chill. I know I can saaAaAaAaaAAaaaaiiaanyyayaang. And I know Deidre, Scott, Mike, and Amy can, too. It was just totally not about your talent, it was about luck and casting and who knows what else. But to drown our sorrows we magically found a buffet to eat at and I had so many starches it was ridiculous haha. After that we were pooped and headed home.
This is all recorded basically just so I don't forgot how this experience was and if you read the whole thing you are awesome. Please don't take this style of writing seriously. LOLs don't belong in real essays, I realize that.
