High School Hijinx, 2000-2003, by Anonymous

From MemoryArchive

Who: Anonymous
What: High School Hijinx
When: 2000-2003
Where: Waco, Texas

During my time in high school, my friends and high perpetrated a lot of pranks that I think are pretty funny. I would like to share them here.

The first thing we came up with was blocking traffic. There was a road that was somewhat busy at night, but not so busy that we wouldn't be able to block it off without someone seeing us do it. What we would do is this: during the week, we would be on the lookout for construction sites. We would steal their cones, wooden barricades, and if we were lucky, those gigantic flashing lights. If someone had a truck, we would steal those plastic orange barrels. We would save them up in the woods behind my friends house during the week. On the weekend, we would take them to my other friends house that had a big row of bushes to hide behind, when no one was coming, we would take them out into the road, and block the whole thing. It was hilarious, because cars would come along and be completely confused. Then, they would have to turn, and make a detour around it. But they had to drive around the entire neighborhood to the exit, and we were close enough to move the cones to where they coming out of. Once we did that, they usually figured out that they were the victim of a prank, and got pissed off and moved enough of the obstacles to get by. Hilarity!

At the same friends house were we set up the barricades, we also used to throw water balloons and wet kleenex at cars driving by at night. Not as clever, but just as funny, because about half the time, people would stop their cars and run around looking for us. It was hilarious until someone actually found one of my friends that did it, and mugged and beat him up. Still hilarious.

The next prank was pulled on a less busy street, because there was a bigger risk of a car swerving. We called it "Cardboard Kitty." We would cut out an outline of a cat, pain it black, and put aluminum foil in for the eyes. At night, we would place it on a blind curve, and when cars would come by, they usually would slam on their brakes in time. But sometimes, people would hit it, and get out to see if it was ok. When they realized it was fake, they usually were pissed off. Sometimes it would get ripped up. The funniest thing that happened while we were doing that, though, is that the time when they people in the car saw the cardboard kitty, and sped up to hit it on purpose. Hilarious.

Another prank we pulled was borderline sexual harrassment. Because of that, we usually tried to stay away from pulling it on girls. We called it "sausage bombing." The first part of the prank was the hardest, because we had to buy the supplies. We had to go into the grocery store, and buy magnum condoms and kielbasa sausages. Then we would take the sausages, put the condoms on them, and either put them on someones front porch and ring the doorbell, or throw them in open car windows of people we knew that were driving around. The reason we stopped doing it to girls was that a couple of my friends (I wasn't there) threw a "sausage bomb" at a random lady at a stoplight, and she looked at it, looked at them, picked up her phone, and said to them, "I'm calling the COPS on your NASTY ass!" Hilarious! Eventually we stopped doing it at all, because we threw it at someone from Waco High School that didn't like us private school punks. He knew who we were, called us, and we basically kept harassing them over the course of a month, which ended with one of my friends getting his front tooth knocked out. He has to wear denture and he's 19. He thinks its hilarious, especially since the kid who knocked his tooth out had to pay for it.